Welcome to Mentoring with New Life Downtown. We believe mentoring is a key form of God’s ongoing discipleship work in our lives (Mt. 28:18- 20). This overview of mentoring is meant to both clarify and equip you to know how to start and maintain mentoring relationships. 

Mentoring as a Form of Discipleship 

Discipleship can be defined as all the ways we follow after Jesus and are formed by Jesus to become like Jesus. To pursue the path of discipleship well, the Holy Spirit often partners us with both a person and a plan. At NLD, we recognize one of the most dynamic discipleship relationships we can have is with mentors who are older, wiser, and/or more experienced than ourselves.  

You can engage with the following forms of mentoring at New Life Downtown:

Whole Life Mentoring 

All of us are created with a calling from God to join him in his work and reflect him and his character to the world. At New Life Downtown, we believe that mentoring relationships are a key discipleship path towards formational growth, maturity, and wisdom.  

Starting with a 1:1 meeting or the Mentored Discipleship training, Pastor Evan will train you how to: Discern a Growth Need, Develop a Growth Plan, and Drive a Growth Season. All of this is done in tandem with the Holy Spirit and a mentor who provides insights, input, and wisdom. We’ll also help you identify a mentor who would uniquely fit how the Spirit is leading you to grow. 

Click here to connect with Pastor Evan and start the conversation of Whole Life Mentoring. 

Marriage Mentoring 

We all need help for our marriages to be healthy and thriving. Maybe you’re facing a life transition, marital tough-times, or need extra care or wisdom to help navigate where life is at.  
Our team of pastors and trained Marriage Mentors are here to love and mentor you and your spouse while you navigate life.  
Click here to connect with Pastor Evan and start the conversation of Marriage Mentoring for you.  

Becoming A Mentor 

For the Christian, any gift we possess is not meant to be consumed only for our good. Rather, God gives gifts to each of us for the common good. IE, we receive gifts to give them away!  
We believe God is continually calling every believer, young and old, to take all that they have received and invest it into those coming up behind them in age and maturity. Every gift of wisdom, experience, victories, and survived failures are meant to be re-invested into those who need what you have gained.  

Click here to connect with Pastor Evan and start the conversation of Whole Life Mentoring. 

Premarital Mentoring  

We are excited to be able to help you better prepare you for marriage. At New Life Downtown, premarital mentoring (aka counseling) is led by our team of pastors and a select group of trained Marriage Mentor couples. Over the course of 5 or 6 meetings between you and a pastor/mentor couple, your relationship will be strengthened and equipped to be better prepared for married life. The assessment tool we use to help guide your premarital time is called Prepare-Enrich, which is the leading assessment tool in the nation. 
Click here to connect with Pastor Evan and start the conversation of Premarital Mentoring (counseling).  


We suggest following what is referred to as a Mentee Driven approach when it comes to the mentoring relationship. For both Mentors and Mentees the expectations are as follows: 

For Mentees

Mentee Driven means that the mentee carries the primary responsibility for making the mentoring relationship happen.   

Step #1 Discern a Growth Need 

First, mentees should spend time Discerning a Growth Need (Ps. 139: 23-24). Your life season and circumstances will impact the need you identify. Needs can be discovered by reflecting on soul questions like:
What is affecting you most right now?
What is bringing you life? What is draining life from you?
What are you celebrating? What are you grieving?
What has changed recently? What has started? What has stopped? What is new?
What do you need from God? Where is he inviting you to grow or be pruned?
What is going well? What needs attention? 

As we discern a growth need, the need fill fit into one of the following categories:

1. Do I need to grow into health, or am I in a place of health and God is inviting me to grow in character or skill?

2. In what area of my character might God be inviting me to join him to develop and mature so I that may better represent what he is like to the world (Eph. 4:1- 3)? 

3. In what skill might God be inviting me to join him to develop and mature so I that may better glorify him in the work he has called me to do (Eph. 2:10)? 

Step #2 Develop a Growth Plan 

Second, we spend time Developing a Growth Plan to help us grow in our discerned growth need. The idea is for holistic growth to occur through 3 of the primary ways God has designed humans to learn and grow: 

1. Living relationally, which includes a scheduled rhythm with a mentor (Ecc. 4:9-10).  

2. Investing intellectually, which includes engaging with books, podcasts, articles, etc (Rom. 12:2). 

3. Practicing experientially, which includes participating in activities that help us practice our discipleship growth goal (Luke 10). 

Step #3 Drive Towards the Growth Goal

Third, with our plan as a roadmap and our mentor and the Holy Spirit as wise guides, the mentee is responsible to Drive Growth. We recommend enacting this plan over a three month season. However, growth is neither automatic nor guaranteed. Once you develop your growth plan, you will need to regularly attend to your growth, much like a skilled gardener. This may mean pruning something old, or prioritizing something new. It may mean just processing with your mentor on what is or is not working, and discussing potential reasons why (John 15). 

Several people are available to help you through the Mentored Discipleship process: 

1. As well as mentors, friends and family are highly valuable in helping you discern, develop, and drive a season of growth. Lean on them for insights and ideas. 

2. Pastor Evan Reedall, will act as pastoral support and will work with you to answer questions, strategize referrals and resources, or give encouragement if you feel lost or stuck. 

3. The Holy Spirit’s presence and work is paramount to this whole process. He desires your formational health and growth more than anyone and is present in you as Encourager and Empowerer

Mentee Drive means that mentors are primarily responsible for responding to the mentee. This may entail discerning, informing, sharing, and guiding the mentee through the growth process that the mentee is driving. Requirements for a successful mentoring relationship include:  

First: Make sure there’s a Clear Ask from the mentee. Mentee Driven means that mentors are committed to a mentoring relationship that addresses a clearly defined goal over the course of a clearly defined season of time. The mentee is responsible for discerning their own goal with the mentors help if asked/able.  

Second: Mentee Driven means that mentors are not there to teach the mentee anything and everything that the mentor knows. Rather, the mentee should arrive to meetings already having discerned what they themselves need to talk about. They should have already created questions or problems to present to the mentor. Mentors should not have to come up with a whole agenda for what to talk about or teach. The wisdom a mentor shares should be in response to questions from the mentees, and the mentor’s content preparation for each meeting should be minimal, if any. This is because the mentor’s preparation is all their life experiences leading up to that meeting.  

Third: Mentoring is more about listening than speaking. A question or problem may be posed by the mentee and the mentor has an immediate idea of how to respond and solve it. The first problem presented is seldom the whole problem, so make sure to listen, ask clarifying questions, and further the listening conversation with questions like ‘what else’, ‘tell me more about ____’, and ‘how does that make you feel?’ The Mentor is responsible for listening, reflecting, asking good questions, caring, and when appropriate giving their input and advice. 

Fourth & Final: Mentoring is more about the gift of availability than knowing what to do or say every time. The younger generations know they have access to every answer the internet could ever provide. What they’re really asking for in mentoring is a committed, available relationship to walk with them and care about them as they navigate life. They care less about how much you know and more about how much you care. They want you to share your lives more than just your expertise.   

The ask/offer of mentoring needs to be clear. Whether you’re asking for someone to mentor you, or offering to mentor someone else, most frustrations come from unmet expectations that start with unclear communication in the first place. As such, we recommend implementing a clearly defined expectation for how the potential mentoring relationship will initially work.  

The 1-2-3 Mentoring Ask

Our recommended mentoring form is that the mentee and mentor schedule their meetings for one hour, twice a month, for three months (the 1-2-3). This rhythm has proven reasonable and effective for attending to the mentees growth plan. A few FAQ’s about this suggestions: 

1. Q: Do you have to stick to a strict hour?  
    A: No. If a meeting is going well and you both have time to go longer than an hour, please meet for longer. But, if one or both of you have limited availability, one hour is a good starting point and an appropriately defined ask.  

2. Q: Do you have to stop meeting after 3 months?  
    A: No. The goal of the 1-2-3 ask is to help you initiate and establish the relationship. Once that three month season is complete, you should take time to discuss what is next. Potential options for ‘next’ include:  

A) You are both available and willing to continue, and agree to another 1-2-3 season.
B) You amend the frequency of meetings to as-needed or as-available.
C) One or both of you are unavailable to continue, so the mentee shows their appreciation and you stop meeting for the time being.

We would like to acknowledge the following and thank them for training and mentoring us in how to disciple and mentor others:
Denver Seminary and their Mentored Formation program
Wes Roberts and his Leadership Design Group
Laura Flanders and her Taproot Innovation ministry